The Art of Screaming

Sam is doing his damnedest (is that how you spell that??) to perfect this art. Oh....my......GOD. Last week was particularly fun. I love the whole screaming-for-no-good-reason thing. He, apparently, thinks he's got plenty of reason. You want to change my diaper? SCREAM!! You want to dress me? SCREAM!! The other day, I thought my skull might split in 2. I gobbled down 4 Advils. How is he not harming his own little brain and ears?? On Tuesday, I went to change his diaper. Unzipped his jammie jams and saw poop escaping the leg area. Fun stuff. In addition to all the screaming, he now loves to grab his junk, which means trying to put his little mitts in his crap when it gets smooshed upward. ::sigh:: I bet you think that's it, but it's not. He also likes to play bucking bronco on the changing pad. He's either totally chill and likes hanging out there or he completly loses his sh*t. Lately, it's more the latter. So, you can imagine how fun this diaper change was. In addition to the aformentioned leg hole leak, this giant poopage was about an inch from going up his back too. It took me like, 7 wipes to get him cleaned up. Had to be sure pee pee was clean and got all up in his chubs. All the while he's SCREAMING and thrashing about. I thought a demon had posessed him. GAH! He continued to vacillate between perfectly content or screamy for the rest of the day. Man, he's lucky he's really cute.

The next day was better. Jr. had a playdate with his darling buddy, Makenna. We were to go to story time at the Woodside library, but couldn't make it on time (who's ever on time with a baby??), so went to the park instead. There, cuteness was on full display as Sam rode the swing for the first time. Check him out.

He was very focused and seemed to be checking out the ground as he swung to and fro. Did you notice how he kicked his little legs? So CUTE! He loved it. His second time in, I played the I'm-gonna-get-you game as he swung towards me. He giggled every time. It was so awesome and so much fun for me too! He was plumb tuckered out after his park experience and took a 2 hour nap that afternoon. I decided to steal a little siesta alongside him. As soon as I fell asleep, the evil UPS man showed up with our diaper delivery. BLIMEY!!!! At least the boy continued his nap. I did laundry :-/

Sam wrapped up his week holding court at our local gastropub, Martins West. We were the first to arrive. While waiting for our party, a couple walked in with a baby in a carrier. The dad looked at Sam and me and we both put our arms in the air and yelled, "Baby in a bar! Baby in a bar!" It was hysterical!!! Sam got to hang out with some of his favorite peeps, The Yummys and Auntie Dayna. It was only his third or fourth time in a restaurant, I think. Fortunately, he didn't get us kicked outta the joint. Despite his previously displayed longing for beer, he stayed on the wagon. Sam was such a good boy throughout the evening. He was just kinda fascinated by all he saw. Lots of lights and new sounds. He liked standing up and looking out the window. A total people watcher.

On a completely different note, is anyone still completely bummed about the 49ers loss?? Man, I was already planning on taking Sam to the Super Bowl victory parade! Our dreams have been dashed. Thanks Kyle Williams for ruining my son's first Super Bowl! Okay, so Sam was more interested in all the sweet attention he was getting from his cutie pie cousins, Jada and Jenna, during the game but the rest of us were bummed. Man, what a way to go out after such a fantastic season. I was still depressed when we got home, so Steve being the dutiful husband he is, made me a martini in which to drown my sorrows. Bleh. Despite such a heartbreaking loss, I can't wait to see what our boys do next season. This season has been such an unexpected pleasure. They are on the brink of greatness. It's been far, far too long. Another by-product of the 49ers loss is the bet I lost. There is now a picture of me in a Giants shirt with a caption about what a loser I am on my Facebook page (Thanks, Dave!). I hope the Giants win it all anyway. I'm so over the machine that is the New England Patriots. Plus, I have alot of New York peeps and I don't want us all to be depressed! So, let's go Giants!

Chub-a-lub

Check out this chub-a-lub! Such a strapping young lad! I swear, he's turning into a giant before my eyes. A friend was holding him on Monday as I looked on and it just hit me all of a sudden that this boy is HUGE. He doesn't have alot of fat, but he is solid and busting out of his 3-6 month clothes at 5 months adjusted age. Yes, busting out of all the clothes I just got him for Christmas :-/ Must be all the solid food. Bananas went over very well recently. Prunes did not and he yacked 'em up, fortunately, before I got his bib off. He'll be getting carrots this morning for the first time. He seems to like orange foods, so I anticipate a happy dude.

Sam is a drooling machine. A veritable waterfall of drool. Yet I still smooch all on him, spit bubbles and all after exclaiming, "Gimme some sugar!!" I kiss him over and over, he smiles. I'm covered in slobber and love every second of it. Seriously, if Steve came at me like that, you think I'd be kissing him?? Uh, NO! Again, I am reminded what it is to love a child.

How about them Niners????? Woooooo WEEEEE! What a game! We're back, baby! We watched with Sam's buddy, Matty. Both boys were so well behaved during the game. They totally got that the Moms and Dads needed to focus. Sam sat on my lap for much of the game and watched with me. I had to contain myself and not scream into his ear with every score. The 1st and 4th quarters were off the hook. At one point, I had to hand Sam off and run around the house yelling. Absolutely thrilling. I cannot wait until Sunday! I'll be wearing my 22 year old 49ers sweater, hoping it brings some good luck.

Eventually, Sam lost interest in the game and became distracted by something else......

Yes, this is our kid. No doubt. You can practically see the bubble over his head, "Um, can someone pass that over?" Better yet, "Mmmm, beer." LOL!!! Doesn't he look cool kickin' back in the recliner? Well, except for his too small, old man looking pants. Thank God Baby Gap is having a sale. I better hit that quick-style.

Let's go old school for a minute. Remember this??

GO NINERS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

The Toughest Job You'll Ever Love

I have changed. I mean, I knew I had, but it REALLY hit me today. My nose (and the I'm-makin'-a-poop-face as seen above) told me it was time for a diaper change. I was taken aback by what I saw - a firm, adult-looking poop, not the typical Sam blow out. I grabbed his ankles and lifted his legs and it stuck to his butt! Guess the solid food is doin' its thing. Here's the funny (gross) part. I was so fascinated by this poop, I actually looked around to see if my phone was handy so I could take a picture of it and send it to Steve. My phone wasn't within arm's reach, so Steve missed out. And I am insane. Well, insane like a parent. I WAS GOING TO TAKE A PICTURE OF POOP. Is this a normal parenting thing, or is there something seriously wrong with me??

On a more serious note...A bunch of gals in one of my support groups and I recently discussed the highs and lows of parenting. As much as I love Sam, especially given his rough start, sometimes it is just HARD. Like the 10 minutes he screamed nonstop in the car Monday night. I tried to talk him down. That totally worked. NOT. I sang to him. That worked for about 10 seconds. He just kept on screaming like it was his job and I thought my head was going to explode. I felt guilty thinking I should be feeling more sorry for whatever is bugging him instead of being frustrated and frazzled. And really, he's a good baby. He doesn't scream ALL the time. He's not colicky, he sleeps through the night like a champ and eats well. We probably have it easy compared to some, but man, I still have those moments where I feel like my head is gonna pop right off.

We had to work so hard to conceive him, then he fought to survive. Why on EARTH am I feeling anything but overjoyed all the live long day?? Hey, did I mention how hard this is sometimes?? No matter how difficult his journey to us was, it doesn't somehow make us less tired, have more hours in the day or reduce our workload. When I feel like I'm going to drop, it just is what it is.

Sometimes, I worry I'm not stimulating him enough or doing all the right things to ensure his development is on track. But let's face it, if you're alone with a baby all day and all night, it's tough to keep them engaged and entertained EVERY. SECOND. OF. THE. DAY. At every check up, he's right on target. He's been home 5 months and we've managed to keep him alive, so I guess we're doing something right. Some days I think I'm a lousy mother because I just wish he'd take a nap so I can have a brief break.

Sometimes Mommy is just tired and the well is dry and I just want to go to bed. But I can never *just* go to bed. I have to PUMP (the ever present bane of my existence), wash bottles, do dishes, etc. And whoever said sleep when the baby sleeps must've had full time help. When he sleeps, I get to shower, do laundry and clean house. Every so often I say, "Screw it," and lay down with him, but pay for it later. Mostly by having a greasy, unwashed face and a little b.o., BUT I do love the stuffing out of that boy. Especially when he smiles at me with smashed peas all over his face. Today, I made him laugh harder than he's ever laughed at me (with me?). It made my heart puff up and I thought, wow, this is the hardest, loveliest gig I've ever had the privilege of having. I am very lucky :)

Happy New Year!

Hey peeps! Did everyone have a great holiday season? We had a wonderful time with Sam. We know he's not old enough to get it yet, but we will never forget it. I was off on Christmas Eve for the first time in years, so I was finally able to make it to our friend Sandi's Christmas Eve party. She, along with other party goers were anxious to take Sam off my hands. He got all the snuggles he could handle. After the party, I arrived home to find lights twinkling, a roaring fire and the delicious smell of prime rib wafting throughout the house. Steve had been slaving away over the stove for hours. He also made a red velvet cake. Yummers. I got Sam dressed in his Christmas Eve jammies and the festivities began. It was a bit magical to be celebrating with our little miracle. The miracle conked out early, so Mom and Dad got to have grown up time to enjoy the fruits of Steve's labor.

Everyone wanted to sleep late the next day. Once we got going, Sam got a wardrobe change into his Christmas Day jammies (reindeer butt!). Steve and I put on our matching red plaid footies and it was all presents, Christmas music and cuteness! Despite his young age, Sam proved to be quite adept at the ripping of wrapping paper. Gave him a little corner to start on and he just went to town. So very talented!

We had visits from Auntie Dayna and Uncle Paul then preparations for Christmas dinner began. Mommy was to contribute butternut squash risotto with carmelized onions and mushrooms, but it turned out to just be onions and mushrooms when I torched the squash while skyping with Grandma. Oh well. It was still delicious. However, not as delicious as Uncle Frank's pan roasted chicken with bacon and rosemary. My mouth is watering just thinking about it. I may have to request it for my birthday dinner.

After working back-to-back doubles on the 30th and 31st and having a sick babysitter, we had a mellow New Year's Eve at home. I got home around 10ish and managed to stay up to ring in the new year with a little bubbly. All in all, it was a great holiday season. It's kinda sad when it's over and you're back to the grind.

This week, we were surprised and delighted to learn our boy was on the cover of the Palo Alto Weekly's year end wrap up issue:

From pa weekly

What an honor to be mentioned in the same breath as a local icon like Steve Jobs! Man, our little guy has come so far. I told Steve the other day that the events of 2011 are finally starting to feel like sort of a distant memory. The pain of the early days of Sam's life aren't quite as acute. I've discovered certain things still trigger deeply painful reactions in me, so I just try to avoid those things. Over all though, it's all good. I plan to spend 2012 not being scared to death and just want to revel in every amazing little new thing Sam does. And he's doing alot! He's cut 2 teeth and has managed to still maintain his cheerful disposition. He's cooing up a storm and making some other weird noises that are just plain funny. Seriously, what is this??!

Sam also started off the new year by having his first solid food, as evidenced above. It was HILARIOUS! Breakfast has never been more entertaining. Our first go at it was with rice cereal, which tastes like paste. After having a few spoonfuls, Sam decided to sneeze and make it go all over the place. We moved on to sweet potatoes and peas. Peas seem to be the favorite thus far. It's so funny how these little things are just endlessly fascinating. And it's just gonna get better.

We hope this new year finds you and yours happy, healthy and ready to embrace all that the year has to offer. So, onward and upward. 2012, BRING IT! We can't wait to see what's in store!